German Rapper in Shooting Stunt: Wanted to Boost Album Sales

Filed under “This is Stupid yet unusually Funny:” See what American Rappers have created worldwide? A criminal record or shooting incidents can increase one’s popularity or ‘Street Cred’… The name of his CD is “Blut Gegln Blut” My pressure has gone up and I’m nervous and that title. It scares the shit out of me (laugh). He does look like any black American Ghetto-nian tho…

German hip-hop star MASSIV has been accused of staging a street shooting in a bid to boost album sales. The gangster rapper was strolling the streets of tough Berlin neighbourhood Neukolln when a man pulled up and fired four bullets at Massiv, one passing straight through his right shoulder, according to a statement released by his record label No Limits Music (…and Master P screams …. “Stop…. MothaF$*#n THEIF!)

A spokesman added, “Massiv is totally shocked. He lost a lot of blood and was near death.” However, police have cast doubt on the scale of the incident – while they accept bullets were fired, they describe Massiv’s injury as a mere graze to the skin. I can’t stop laughing, help, please help me! Cops are also flummoxed (OK, I just stopped laughing WTF? “Flummoxed” I’m going to use that word all weekend) by reports of his brush with death, which began to appear on Massiv’s website just minutes after the attack. (Can somebody say STUNT) A police spokesman says, “Several shots are supposed to have been fired at the singer from close range, so we are rather surprised that only one bullet grazed his arm (He should have hired me as his Marketing Dir. I would have at LEAST filmed it for Youtube!!!). However, there is no doubt that there was an incident.” Massiv has vehemently denied allegations the incident was a publicity stunt to promote his new album One Man One Word, due out next month (Feb08).


Leave a Reply